When God Doesn't Make Sense

I recently finished a book When God Doesn't Make Sense by James Dobson. I was really encouraged by that book and I would like to refer this book to everyone who ask why. I realized that God has special plan in my life. I might not see it now but He does have purpose in my life. Yesterday, I got a call from a old friend from BIOLA. He is pastor at a church in Conn. We talked about the past and the current heart that God has given us. He is actually the one who encouraged me towards mission. At the time I was overwhelmed by so much mission talks. But I see that God had purpose during that time for now. God does makes sense even when we cannot understand.

Pray, pray, pray

We need to pray just to it make today. This is a rap lyric from a group I don't remember. As many of you all know, I love rap music. I think I like it because they don't really sing. This gives me hope. I thought about this lyric as I was challenged to pray more. For this Memorial Day, I went to retreat with our church's Intercessory Prayer Team. I had a blessing time. This retreat challenged me to pray. I have made a promise to come out to Early Morning Prayer everyday. Please pray for me that I will be faithful in prayers.

What do you think?

Last night at the Unification College the speaker mentioned about love that I thought was very insightful. He said love is not a choice but giving up. He mentioned about choosing a wife is a not only a choice but giving up on other women. He also mentioned about our love for Jesus. Is it based on our choice to love Him or is it giving up on other things for Jesus. As I think about this, I realize that there are many things I need to give up for Jesus.

My 2 brothers

This morning while I was eating breakfast, I realized that I have 2 brothers. I have 2 brothers in law through my 2 sisters but they feel more like real brothers to me. Today for some reason I just felt rich having 2 brothers. Even though I do not see them regularly I see them through prayers. I love them dearly. God knew I wanted a brother and He gave me two. He is soooo good. I love my sisters as well.

Remembering the past

Last night I had dinner with few old LACPC students of mine. They are all grown up and working in their respective jobs. Even though I do not see them every week, I felt the bond right away. I realized the power of God's love bond once again. I used to tell them love hurts and punch them in their arms. If they would say that it hurts, I would respond back with I told you love hurts. I can honestly say I love them very much. Although they are not my students any more, they will always be my students in my heart. I love you all.

I finally got my contact lense

Today, I picked up the contact lense for my right eye. Even though it was difficult to put in, the doctor gave the OK to leave with it. But I have trouble with it already. I am supposed to see nothing. However I see from my right eye. The only difference is that I see with red color from the contact. I guess whoever colored it in did not do a good job. I will see if this continues before I return it. The surgery date to open my eye lid is set for 6/22. I am praying that I will not need the surgery. I trust in the Lord whatever happens. Please pray for me that I will not lose heart.

Contact lense

Yesterday, I went to UCLA for two reasons. One was to see the doctor to perform opening the eye lid. He was not able to guarantee the same as my left eye. He will be able to open it little. I guess little is better than not at all. Since my eye is small anyways, maybe it will not look that bad. Second reason was to pick up the contact lense for my right eye. I was trying to put them on and I just could not do it on my own. I have to go back on Weds. to try again. The doctor said, I have to be able to put it on 3xs by myself before I could take them. I did not know it would be that difficult. I will be opening my right eye more often now. I will not see from it but you can't tell.

Am I excited for my salvation?

For the past several weeks, I've been going to the NK Unification school. God has really blessed me and continually gives me the heart to serve at NK. I don't know when but God knows and I am fully satisfied with that. Yesterday during the lecture, Rev. Dae Hoon Kim spoke about being excited for the salvation. I thought about this a lot throughout today. I want to say yes but I see my life not living like I am excited. I see myself worrying about so many different things. The Bible teaches us not to worry but to seek His Kingdom first. And everything else will be taken care of. I know that and I have taught on this. Lord, I pray for more excitement in my life for my salvation in You.and for me to fully trust in Your faithfulness.

God is putting a desire in my heart to stir this generation

These days, God is putting a desire in my heart to stir this generation with a passion for Him. This past Monday I met a dear brother for lunch. We were talking about various things. And God has placed a desire in my heart to do something for this generation. I am not sure what to do but to be in prayer for what God has planned. Today, I had lunch with another brother and shared what is in my heart. We both decided to pray and seek the Lord. I am not sure what is going to take place. But there will be something God is going to do. I want to faithfully pray for God to do something. I am writing to tell you to pray for God to do something for this generation. I want to invite anyone of you who has the desire to see this generation for God to let me know. Revivals in the past came because people of God earnestly prayed. Let's pray to God to see what He will do.

Why didn't Job complain?

Today, I reflected on why didn't Job complain to God. If he did then I have reasons to complain as well. We know why God did what He did to Job. But for Job going through all the sufferings simply trusted God. He rather said, blessed be the name of the Lord. This is a big challenge to me and I do say blessed be the name of the Lord. But it is getting hard. As I look at my life, I will be 36 soon and no girlfriend. The college ministry is not growing in numbers. But rather decreasing. I don't feel confident in doing lots of things. These days I go out to early morning prayer to pray for God to use me. I want to trust in the Lord like Job did no matter how bad the circumstances are. I trust in God who is faithful. Please continue to pray for me.